Rob called a board meeting of the adults on Saturday morning. We grabbed breakfast and met around the conference table at Rob's work. This was business.
Rob turned the time over to me. The girls were sitting across from us, arms folded, ready for a gum fight.
I started, "It dawned on me that somehow you've been getting the message that we don't trust you. That we believe you are good and responsible only because we are managing you. That if we didn't have rules and consequences, you'd go wild."
Mia went off about how hard she works, how we won't let her do anything, how we treat her like a kid....
Rob interrupted, "Mia, don't talk yourself out of a sale."
She got quiet.
I continued, "The thing is, we do trust you. We have just been trying to figure out how to best support you and set you up for success. We know you'll make mistakes, but you're smart and can handle them and learn from them.
"What we're saying is... it's time to turn over the responsibility for your own life to you. No more rules, curfew, or consequences. You both have full-time jobs and are taking on adult lives. Mia, you'll have total freedom once you move out to college, so this is a time of transition. You'll have the freedom here, but Dad and I will be available if you need us. If things get extreme, we may have to revisit things, but we don't think that will happen.
"We do ask that you don't drive after 2:00 a.m. for your own safety, that you don't have one-on-one at our home after midnight/1:00 a.m. on weekends, and that you are quiet at the house when it gets late with friends over out of respect and consideration for the family.
Mia: "Does that mean I'm not grounded for curfew last night and can go to the concert tonight??
This is the best day of my life!!"
"We're adults!!"
(MK's version of an "adult" pose)
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