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Tuesday, March 27, 2012

Hello and Good-bye




About 6:00 p.m. Saturday night, Elle's doctors take her off sedation to assess her brain function. It is nearly 7:20, and she has not moved.

And then, she wakes up.

Elle's eyes flutter, and I say, "Hi, Sweetie!!" She immediately opens her eyes and looks right at me. She has a tube down her throat and a neck brace on. "Hi!! Oh, Sweetie, are you hurting?" She nods yes. "All these people are here to help you feel better, okay? Look, Grandma's here, too!" She looks to the other side of the bed at Grandma leaning over the bed with Grandpa. Granny and Grandpa Doug stand next to me, and Rob is at the foot of her bed. "Does your tummy hurt?" She nods yes again. This time the doctor sees for himself that she is nodding, and it's not just our wishful thinking. He asks me if Elle knows what happened. I ask her, "Do you remember what happened?" She opens her eyes wide and nods yes. She moves her lips trying to speak. "You were run over by the car." Wide eyes and nodding. I keep repeating to everyone in the room what she is doing, in case they missed it. Rob laughs, "We know! We are right here!"

We are elated. Rob talks to her in his cutest daddy voice.

The look in Elle's eyes tells me she's completely aware and in tact. Her eyes register no fear and no acute pain. I search for things to say to her. I don't want to scare her with too much emotion and concern. "I love you, Sweetie. You're doing so good! All these people are doing everything they can to help you feel better." She lifts both of her arms as if to be held. We gasp, so excited she can move both of her arms. They are splinted and taped with IV's, and the doctor decides she needs to be sedated before she starts to feel too much pain.

And, just like that, she is out.

Rob and I are overcome with relief. The doctors are no longer concerned about her brain function to this point. Her responses show she has complex as opposed to simple brain function in many areas of her brain.

I didn't know it, but that was the last time I would get to talk to my baby girl.

3 comments:

Linda Barton said...

((hugs))

Peter said...

Lorenne and Rob:

My prayers are with you. It takes a lot of strength and courage to talk about such a loss.

Best wishes to you and the family.

Peter Howland

Jacqui said...

I probably shouldn't comment while I'm crying, but I want you to know that your experience with your darling Elle has, in a strange twist, strengthened my resolve to be a better mother and wife. Running the risk of sounding trite, I won't list all the ways, but every day I think of you and I think of Elle and I have a more eternal perspective. Thank you for sharing your love and your grief. Both are incredibly touching.